WYTS 2019

**Iamjacks** · 08-16-2019, 02:21 PM

Steelers Day

"This is the most aggressively stupid team in the whole sport."

https://deadspin.com/why-your-team-s...ers-1837181351

Just enjoy the dysfunction! (they started 7-2-1 FFS!)

It will be top posted on the deadspin.com wyts page for the entire weekend!

Happy Friday!

An excerpt to get you started:

"This is the most aggressively stupid team in the whole sport. They forgot that a safety punt is a live ball. They blew a game to Jon Gruden because their kicker apparently wore bowling shoes onto the field. They called a fullback dive on a fake punt (it did not work). They lost a road game to the Broncos because they are statistically unable to ever win a single game after flying due west. Their defensive coordinator game-planned for Tyler Eifert despite the fact that Eifert broke his ankle months prior. They beat the Patriots in December and couldn’t make hay of it. And, of course, their best player skipped what would turn out to be his final game with the team because he couldn’t stand being around the quarterback one second longer. Can’t argue with him there.

This is how a 7-2-1 start collapses into irrelevance. This is how a Super Bowl contender idles itself into fraudulence. This is how fans who choke pregnant ladies in the stands end up with a team built in their own, pathetic self-image. You will not find a drop of shame anywhere within a 400-mile radius of this team’s stadium. That’s why the Steelers will fuck up in the EXACT same way at all the EXACT same times all over again, and again and again and again. They’ve got a process now."

**NjRavensFan** · 08-16-2019, 02:42 PM

Holy shit. That might be the best one I’ve ever read.

**bossofataka** · 08-16-2019, 03:12 PM

Wow, not shading away from bashing ´em big time.. Laughed out loud several times, some of the comments are hilarious.

**JimZipCode** · 08-16-2019, 07:55 PM

Originally Posted by bossofataka

Wow, not shading away from bashing ´em big time.. Laughed out loud several times, some of the comments are hilarious.

The comments are usually the best part.

I lost my shit on several of them.

**Bhcforlife** · 08-20-2019, 01:12 PM

Ravens one is out. I don't like it as much as previous years.

https://deadspin.com/why-your-team-s...ens-1837249832

Denny from Dundalk will spend the next five years complaining that they should never have let Flacco walk.

Harbs fired Mornhinweg after that loss to the Chargers. To replace him, he hired … Jesus H. Christ are you kidding me, he hired Greg Roman? That’s like trading in hemorrhoids for an anal fissure!

What might not suck: Ozzie Newsome would skip over prime Randy Moss in a draft to take a second-string ILB from Alabama instead. But he’s gone now, so I guess you’ve got that going for you.

**Bhcforlife** · 08-20-2019, 01:17 PM

This quote from a fan submission is pretty good, made me LOL at my desk.

Trace McSorley will be our starting QB weeks 11 through 17, after Mr. Jackson is laid to waste by an OLB while running a route on some cutesy bullshit “reinventing the game” play, and then when RG3 obliterates both knees the very next down. Assfuck me gently with a chainsaw.

**Shrubbs** · 08-20-2019, 01:57 PM

Originally Posted by Shrubbs

God it's just going to be so much unfunny Lamar can't throw bullshit that we've heard 24X7X365. They'll probably have stuff about Ray Lewis being a murderer, John Harbaugh being a jerk/liar, and maybe some Ray Rice shit.

Half right.

**moose10101** · 08-20-2019, 05:08 PM

Obviously not an unbiased opinion, but that seemed to have all of the usual anger and bitterness, with a severe shortage of the humor.

**Iamjacks** · 08-20-2019, 08:24 PM

Originally Posted by moose10101

Obviously not an unbiased opinion, but that seemed to have all of the usual anger and bitterness, with a severe shortage of the humor.

Yeah, it's repetitive this year. Every city is worthless, full of racists, aholes, no fans are worthwhile, and most end with a fan blaming their dad for their Fandom and for dying on them. Light on the jokes and most aren't funny. It's like he's burnt out and needs to get some ghost writers.

**Ortizer** · 08-20-2019, 08:52 PM

I did like this gem.

"Fifty years from now, Supreme President Barron Trump will have Baltimore firebombed to avenge daddy and Flacco will still be eating up too much dead money for this team."

Sent from my F8331 using Tapatalk

**Iamjacks** · 08-22-2019, 02:51 PM

From the Bears today

Watch Earl Thomas (I think?) clean up after the interception Trubisky threw. That's what I'm talking about.

https://mobile.twitter.com/FanDuel/s...26autosize%3D1

**Iamjacks** · 08-22-2019, 02:58 PM

More from the Bears

"Your coach: Matt Nagy, a once competent fellow whose psyche has completely, visibly deteriorated since kicker Cody Parkey missed the 43-yard field goal that would have sent the Bears to their doom at the hands of L.A. in the divisional round. You would have thought Nagy missed the kick himself. Here is what Nagy did after Parkey missed that field goal:

• He got pissy that Parkey went on the Today Show to talk about it.

• He cut Parkey.

• He brought in three new kickers and forced all of them to attempt kicks from that same haunted distance, and ordered them to do so in an atmosphere of manufactured pindrop silence. They all missed."

This is absolutely the worst thing you can do. Hypnosis is not one of my two doctoral degrees, but I have studied it heavily, and I have done stage shows (probably should start doing again), and this is exactly how to anchor failure to feeling bad. He's done the exact opposite of what he wants. He has installed a losing mindset into his team when they feel bad. This is death for his team.