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08-16-2011, 10:16 AM #11
Re: If Gaither showed up to practice...
*fade in from black*
ANNOUNCER: In a world… where no one will protect you…
*rapid-fire video montage of Joe Flacco and Matt Cassel being repeatedly and violently sacked*
Friday…
*ominous music plays*
August 19...
*sound of hammer and anvil*
The Baltimore Ravens visit the Kansas City Chiefs...
*sound of football pads colliding at high speed*
Two warriors…
*more ominous music*
Gaither
versus
Cousins
*sound of distant screams, horror-movie-style*
Two men enter…
One man leaves…
Well, I mean if he feels like it, and isn't busy or something…
*sound of football players tackling, grunting*
On the gridiron it's lack of talent versus lack of work ethic…
*sound of an X-box video game*
*still shot of Gaither standing around with his belly hanging out of his shirt*
*still shot of Cousins fighting with his own teammates*
*fade to black*
*sound of frightened little boy asking, "Mommy, are bad offensive tackles real?"
FRIDAY. NIGHT. FOOTBALL.
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