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  1. #1

    Heroes and Goats (Bunglepalooza edition)



    *DISCLAIMER: The anger and frustration expressed in this post are mine and mine alone. In no way does my rage and intense hatred towards the events that occured during the game Sunday reflect the views or opinions of the polite and even-tempered folks that run the Ravens24x7 message board. Although I'm sure they're pissed too.


    HEROES

    1) ED REED- Still the best. A beast in the passing and running games Sunday, you were definitely the man who made OchoCinco "Kiss the Baby" with the (as I predicted) Pick-6 that produced half of our points. HOF should be in your future, even if you don't play another down.

    2) RAY RICE- You're nothing but positive yardage waiting to happen, man... Can't say enough about how you extend plays and move those chains. Flacco knows that TD he has in his stat column has an asterix with your name by it.

    3) RAVENS HOME CROWD- Best home crowd around. LOUD and VISCIOUS. I'm talking about with the amp knob turned all the way up to 11. How the Ravens lost with such an awesome crowd is beyond me. How many delay of game penalties do they expect you to cause? Sheesh!

    4) TODD HEAP- You may be the toughest tight end I've ever seen play. Despite being hung out to dry by your QBs for years, you still never shy away from making the catch, absorbing the blast and turning upfield for YAC. Amazing.

    5) SAM KOCH- Even though kickers and punters aren't really football players in the eyes of some, I'm damn proud to have your foot on our team. V.I.P.... Let's Kick It!!

    Honorable Mentions:

    1. Dawan Landry- You had a big 3rd Down sack and a big 3rd Down pass break up that really kept us in it in the first half.

    2. Jarett Johnson- Nice blitz sack, bro... Didn't know you could move that fast!

    3. Mark Clayton- After a tremendous sideline catch late in the game for a first down, your redemption was all but assured on the go route. Until Flack overthrew the TD.

    4. Le'Ron McClain- That hurdle in the first half had comparisons to Renaldo Nehemiah being made, dude...Schweet. Are you sure you weigh 240lbs?



    GOATS

    1) JOHN HARBAUGH- No discipline, excessive penalties, wasted timeouts-- we look confused and dazed out there. Not at all like a team that's supposed to "Play Like a Raven"...

    2) RAVENS DEFENSE-Dude, I've seen ugly virgins get more penetration than our front seven did Sunday. To top it all off, half the defense forgets how to tackle and a streak that's been around since the Billick era is snapped by Cedric Benson.

    3) JOE FLACCO- I remember during the great touchdown drought of 2000 when we played the Jags in Jax that Qadry Ismail was wide open down the left sideline for a TD that would have sealed the game and Tony Banks overthrew him for no good reason. At least we WON that game on 5 Stover field goals... Less Sloppy Joe, more Joe Cool, STAT!

    4) RAY LEWIS- That hit on OuchoStinko will probably make a highlight reel on youtube and NFL Network, but I KNOW you know better than that, Ray. About the dumbest play I can remember from you in a long time. It cost us BIGTIME.

    5) CAM CAMERON- Your offensive gameplan has been just that lately...OFFENSIVE. Back to the drawing board, which better include lots of run calls. Don't let the success of the first three games go to your head, Cam. And who names their kid "Cam" anyway?




  2. #2
    Join Date
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    Re: Heroes and Goats (Bunglepalooza edition)

    Hard to argue any of this.

    And this marks my first agreement with you re. Harbs.

    Good stuff as always ... why you're not getting paid for this, I will never know.
    WARNING: This post may contain material offensive to those who lack wit, humor, common sense and/or supporting factual or anecdotal evidence. All statements and assertions contained herein may be subject to literary devices not limited to: irony, metaphor, allusion and dripping sarcasm.




  3. #3
    Join Date
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    Re: Heroes and Goats (Bunglepalooza edition)

    Quote Originally Posted by RAVENOUS52 View Post
    2) RAVENS DEFENSE- Dude, I've seen ugly virgins get more penetration than our front seven did Sunday. To top it all off, half the defense forgets how to tackle and a streak that's been around since the Billick era is snapped by Cedric Benson.

    Lady Raven (aka Slinky)

    *the poster formerly known as Raven31

    Save The Last Dance (1/6/2013) - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nzZbWHjyqJY

    Mile High Miracle (1/12/2013) - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=21ugOF34jhA




  4. #4

    Re: Heroes and Goats (Bunglepalooza edition)

    I would take Clayton out of the honorable mention category. He was a lucky call away from a fumble and he did nothing spectacular. I also wouldn't make Flacco a goat considering there were very few open receivers. Yes he slightly overthrew Clayton, but a better receiver would have made a second effort or laid out for the ball.




  5. #5

    Re: Heroes and Goats (Bunglepalooza edition)

    Good stuff as always. Exclamation on Defense, specifically Mr. Foxworth - dude you better start earning your paycheck, man!!!
    "Grab those pusillanimous sons-a-bitches by the nose and kick 'em in the balls.." General George S. Patton




  6. #6

    Re: Heroes and Goats (Bunglepalooza edition)

    Quote Originally Posted by HoustonRaven View Post
    Hard to argue any of this.

    And this marks my first agreement with you re. Harbs.

    Good stuff as always ... why you're not getting paid for this, I will never know.
    Just proud to serve, man. You know how that goes.


    I would take Clayton out of the honorable mention category. He was a lucky call away from a fumble and he did nothing spectacular. I also wouldn't make Flacco a goat considering there were very few open receivers. Yes he slightly overthrew Clayton, but a better receiver would have made a second effort or laid out for the ball.
    Clayton did his job and put us in perfect position to finish the Bengals off if Joe simply flicks his wrist properly. Flacco missed the pass that Chad freakin' Henne made to Ted Ginn Jr. last night. He's better than that. There was no "second effort" to be made unless he was going to magically have a rocket appear on his back. Poor deep throw. No excuse.

    Good stuff as always. Exclamation on Defense, specifically Mr. Foxworth - dude you better start earning your paycheck, man!!!
    Yeah we need him to get better fast. Although the fumble recovery was money.




  7. #7
    Join Date
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    Re: Heroes and Goats (Bunglepalooza edition)

    I think the honorable mention of Landry will be debated. I'd have to put him in my top 5 "Ravens on the hot seat" list, due to the fan backlash over his play. (Along with Foxworth, Clayton, Fabian Washington, and Tavares Gooden)

    Tons of people clamoring that Jim Leonard was the greatest and Landry is just not NFL caliber, missing bunches of plays. I think he's just had a few mistakes which've ended up on spotlight plays, so it's easy to call out the few mistakes and miss the decent play on others. Also, the fact is his strength is run stopping, not pass coverage. If you have him covering a good WR, it's going to be tough for him to keep up in single coverage.
    .
    .
    “When I think of a Baltimore Raven - we go in there, we take your lunch box, we take your sandwich, we take your juice box, we take your applesauce, and we take your spork and we break it. And we leave you with an empty lunch. That’s the Baltimore Raven way.” - Steve Smith Sr.


    Call me a Special Teams coach again. I dare you! I double dare you, MFer!




  8. #8

    Re: Heroes and Goats (Bunglepalooza edition)

    Good job. Keep up the good work on the column. I know it's harder to write when we lose....




  9. #9

    Re: Heroes and Goats (Bunglepalooza edition)

    Quote Originally Posted by Dave Lap View Post
    Good job. Keep up the good work on the column. I know it's harder to write when we lose....
    Definitely. I normally wait 24 hours after a loss before engaging in interaction with other humans again. What really pissed me off was the fact that the crowd was STELLAR Sunday and it was blatantly wasted like so many mixed drinks at a Girls Gone Wild audition.




  10. #10

    Re: Heroes and Goats (Bunglepalooza edition)

    Quote Originally Posted by RAVENOUS52 View Post
    Yeah we need him to get better fast. Although the fumble recovery was money.
    It was that; but only because our All World Safety knows how to make things happen! Foxworth should have a fraction of Reed's football IQ...oops, I better watch myself, here, before the Fan Police censure my butt.
    "Grab those pusillanimous sons-a-bitches by the nose and kick 'em in the balls.." General George S. Patton




  11. #11

    Re: Heroes and Goats (Bunglepalooza edition)

    Ugly Virgin OMG sides are hurtin




  12. #12

    Re: Heroes and Goats (Bunglepalooza edition)

    Quote Originally Posted by ravenjoe View Post
    It was that; but only because our All World Safety knows how to make things happen! Foxworth should have a fraction of Reed's football IQ...oops, I better watch myself, here, before the Fan Police censure my butt.

    No censorship here, man. Say what you want, how you want, just so long as I agree with it...

    Seriously though, we're all real fans in our own way...Some just deal with poor performance better than others.

    But the yards we gave up to Cedric Benson don't bode well for next week's matchup with Adrian Peterson.




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