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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
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    Athlete Allergies



    Ok, I am convinced that a large number of pro athletes have an allergy. It seems to inflict a large segment of athletes and, in particular, football players. I'd love to get everyones thoughts on this.

    The allergy is cabs.

    Lance Briggs definitely has this allergy. Other pro players and sadly, some Ravens, also seem to have this allergy. What is it about pro football that causes these mega million dollar athletes become so allergic to cabs? Is there something in the gatoraid at the pro level? Maybe the synthetic half grass, half plastic fields cause it?

    And this isnt really confined to football either. Baseball, Basketball, etc all seem to have their fare share of athletes that have come down with this affliction. Heck, even some college players seem to come down with this allergy to cabs.

    I mean, it has to be an allergy right? What else could possibly explain why millionaires refuse to grab a $15 cab ride after they have been drinking?
    WARNING: This post may contain material offensive to those who lack wit, humor, common sense and/or supporting factual or anecdotal evidence. All statements and assertions contained herein may be subject to literary devices not limited to: irony, metaphor, allusion and dripping sarcasm.




  2. #2

    Re: Athlete Allergies

    Briggs at least is not allergic to intelligence.

    If he had any doubt whatsoever that he might be close to legal limits or drunk, he simply leaves. Then he's stuck with abandoning a car after it crashed...which...well, really has no consequences.

    It will be nearly impossible to determine if he was drunk or drinking or doing anything else.

    It sounds bad....but you have to give props for that decision, even if it was preceded by stupidity.




  3. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    Houston, TX Y'all
    Posts
    23,361

    Re: Athlete Allergies

    Quote Originally Posted by ExiledRaven View Post
    Then he's stuck with abandoning a car after it crashed...which...well, really has no consequences. It sounds bad....but you have to give props for that decision, even if it was preceded by stupidity.
    If you think Briggs wasnt drinking, I have a bridge in Dundalk I'd like to sell you. There are already reports starting to creep out that he was at a night club in Chicago a half hour before the accident. Not to mention he phoned in a phony police report.

    Im sorry, but I dont give any props to athletes who lack an even modest amount of integrity. And leaving the scene of an accident does have consequences -- he was charged with a crime.

    Normal people avoid being charged. Some athletes seem to be ok with charges as long as it doesnt conflict with their lifestyle.
    WARNING: This post may contain material offensive to those who lack wit, humor, common sense and/or supporting factual or anecdotal evidence. All statements and assertions contained herein may be subject to literary devices not limited to: irony, metaphor, allusion and dripping sarcasm.




  4. #4

    Re: Athlete Allergies

    No no, I absolutely think he had been drinking, I don't think you crash a car that late at night and leave it without having a reason.

    But by leaving the scene, there is no way to prove he was in fact (or not) drinking/drunk/falling asleep.

    There is no way the commissioner can do much. It's a misdemeanor to leave the car. Next thing we'll see people suspended for 4 games for running a red light.

    That's the real point I am trying to make. He's going to completely avoid trouble with both the law and the league simply by leaving. Great call to the agent/lawyer or Briggs is smarter than I thought.

    edit: me being a lawyer, I find the whole situation terribly messed up but funny. I'd been wondering when a player might pull something like this.




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